Off the Hook

I got ambushed in church on Veteran’s Day. Ambushed by my unforgiveness of a former pastor. Some of you were there—a church retreat in the fellowship hall on November 11, 2005, led by David Brown of The Healing Tree.

We’re talking 20+ years of unforgiveness--long enough to have forgotten I held it. But it reared its ugly head that day. I could not have been more unprepared. At first I silently protested. I argued the pastor didn’t deserve to be forgiven. Only reluctantly did I join the forgiveness prayers two church members offered, as I quietly sobbed.

That’s when I unhooked myself from the pastor’s sin. It was as if I had untied the rope that connected us all those years.

Yet, in an odd way, a new connection seemed to release.

Ten days later: November 21.

“I” decided to drop off film for development at Meijer before work. An unusual time of Monday morning shopping for me, I was able to park near Handicap Parking facing an older-style Buick, close to the south door and photo department. An old man cautiously made his way toward the store. There was something familiar about him.

I had to slow my gait as I walked behind him through the entry. Could it be? I said his name as a question, choosing to include the title, Reverend.

He either hadn’t heard me, or he wasn’t who I thought he was. For a brief moment I considered myself “off the hook.” However, it was precisely because I was off the hook, that I could circle in front of him and ask again, this time looking into his face. He answered, “Yes.”

He showed no recognition of the woman from two decades earlier until I offered my name. I asked how he was. “Well,” he said. He asked how I was. “Well,” I said. Then I placed my right hand on his upper left arm and truthfully said, “It’s good to see you.”

I did business at the photo counter, he headed for the bakery, and we both exited the south door about the same time.

As I backed my car out of the lot, I blinked my headlights at the old man in the Buick, and waved good-bye.